My First Attempt in Organized Sports in 25 years – Dodgeball.Posted: March 30, 2012
I am writing this post with a little sadness. Our team, yes, team, was eliminated from the dodgeball tournament tonight. The saddest part was that my daughter was there to witness my failure at a team sport. To try and motivate the team I told them that I was going to die and that my one remaining wish is for my daughter to see me win a game. After that, we won the next round. The score was 10 or 20 to 1. Once the other team pulls away with a 15 point lead you stop counting what the score is and wish for a heart attack or stroke to blame the loss on or something like that. My head was not in the game. I was dreaming of unicorns and cats. Just like the old days when I got stuck in left or right field. It was the one that no one hit to and all the kids who sucked counted flowers.
I don’t think that my team like me yelling “SHOW THEM BOTH YOUR BALLS!” or “BE SOMETHING! BE! BE! SOMETHING!” The ref let me know that the phrase was “be aggressive!”. Thanks ref! I knew I was close to it.
For some reason it was sad to tell The Fox that we lost. Being almost four, he wants to know why. You can’t tell a four year old that you lost because you sucked. You have to put on your adult hat and say that the better team won. Then mumble “those M F er’s!” I also didn’t tell him about how a teammate asked “You’re knocked out already? Boy, that was faster than last time.”
We started to plan our next team adventure, kickball. I am still waiting to see if I am a free agent. I hope not ,I actually had fun loosing with these guys. We had fun. That’s what counts, right? Now I know exactly what the Colt’s feel like.